Hit a roadblock

I’ve come close to dumping this blog several times in the past few weeks and I’m not quite sure why I haven’t gone through with it. Time is a precious commodity I don’t have much of these days and when I do manage to find a spare moment, I’m either a) reluctant to spend it sitting in front of my computer after I’ve spent all day sitting at my computer in the office, or b) stuck for ideas on what to post.

I blame the latter issue on my lack of clear mandate for this blog. It’s easy enough to use it as an aggregate for interesting posts I find in other places online. Embed a link, add a bit of personal insight and I’ve got material to populate it. But that’s lazy and boring.

My last blog was a travel journal and it worked well. Its purpose was always clear: to keep my friends and family back home up to date on my adventures abroad. It grew into something even my new friends abroad would read – more as a source of amusement, than information. It had a solid readership, demand for content and I was never at a loss for writing material. Everything was new and strange and begging to be described and documented. Filling those archives was easy and rewarding.

But now? I could write about my new job, but I’m limited there because unlike the job I had when I was living in Jordan, my co-workers know I’ve got this site. Not that I would write negative things about my experiences at the office (I actually love my job thus far), but I don’t feel I’m as free to describe it all without censoring myself, knowing they may be reading it.

Same goes for a lot of the other things I’ve been doing lately. Dates, parties, community activities and other job interviews I had prior to taking this job. Perhaps that’s my own fault for telling people I’ve got this blog. Everyone knows about it and I feel I’ve painted myself into a corner.

Despite everyone knowing about the blog, readership is probably non-existent. I’m now in regular contact with most of the people who read my other blog and they no longer need a website to find out what I’m doing. So who exactly is my audience? If I’m writing for myself, I might as well take this offline, keep a journal and write whatever the heck I want without having to worry about who sees it.

But like I said, I haven’t yet axed this account. I can’t seem to make myself give up that easily.

I suppose I just wanted to provide a little context in case someone stumbles across this site and wonders why I haven’t posted anything in months. But if it comes to that — months between posts — this blog’s days are most definitely numbered.

Drained

I haven’t fallen off the face of the planet. I’m just tired.

And I’ve just spent what little energy I had left today writing this post. Looking at a computer screen hurts my brain at this point, so we’ll chat later.